Surviving in the midst of COVID-19
The last two weeks of being at home with basically nothing to do while everybody tries to figure out our new normal has allowed me to do some very deep but much needed cleansing and soul searching.
For many of my close friends and family, it is not news to you that this last year and a half-ish has been a weird time in my life. Difficult situations at school caused me to constantly rethink my career decision, my family has gone through many unforeseen changes in the last few months, the fall semester of senior year happened which included a lot of goodbyes and “see ya later(s)” to people I love dearly, and obviously this spring semester of student teaching and probably most of my summer has come to a halt because of COVID-19.
I am doing my best. There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t shed a few tears. Some days are more difficult than others. Sometimes I catch myself feeling very alone – this was especially difficult in St. Louis because I knew basically nobody and my routine consisted of going to school and then going home, a big change from my always busy schedule in Cape. I remind myself daily that just because someone leaves me on read does not mean they hate me or that I need to re-evaluate our entire friendship. I am working to learn to be honest with myself and to hold myself accountable so I can do the same with my future students (who I’ll get to meet in a few short months!!).
BUT in the midst of all of the craziness over the last year, I gave a recital, received scholarships and awards, held leadership positions in organizations I hold near and dear to my heart, paid for an entire week-long trip to Hawaii that is scheduled to happen in June 🤞🏼, moved to St. Louis where I know all of three people, and got a real big girl job. I started going to therapy again and allowed myself to be put back on antidepressants. Yay me!
Check on your graduating seniors. Check on your other students too, but don’t forget that your seniors are in this weird limbo right now. Some of them are doing better than others. Some of them might need a quick “I’m thinking of you” text or a short FaceTime call just to say hi. They probably miss you. I do.
Phew. I’m not really sure what I accomplished with this post, if anything, but if you made it all the way to the end then hey there! Congrats! Love you.